Isn't that the name of an apocalyptic UK movie with a memorable opening sequence of an Empty London, by a guy called something McDonald (Andrew? Alex?) who claims to support environmental charitable causes but never actually shells out (I got inside info!)? Would normally run a quick google search to sound more knowledgeable, and assured but .. well since I haven't posted anything in .. 28 days (I knew I wrote it for a reason), then why pretend to be trying to keep on top of this Bog Off of a Blog.
The month has not gone the way I'd hoped I suppose, but hey it's just one month, plenty more where that came from ... right? Am currently writing, I hope, my final essay .. on adolescents with Cystic Fibrosis - "the UK's most common, life threatening inherited disease" (Cystic Fibrosis Trust website), which in the UK has an average life expectancy of just 31 years.
With this in mind, I feel guilty for posting the now, rather self-indulgently morose quote i picked out in a book on adolescence, regarding what parents may be going through while their kids struggle with more expansive cognitive capabilities, forming new peer relationships and puberty! The irony is that "parents of adolescent children" are described typically as people between 35-45. This is what I guess made my sense of non-achievement all the more incisive - I don't even have any kids yet and I am 35 in 2.5 weeks!
"Most adults reach their occupational plateau - the point at which they tell how succesful they are likely to be - during midlife, And many must deal with whatever gap exists between their early aspirations and their actual achievements" (Gould, 1972).
Interestingly, Miles bought me a book on the stages in a person's life 2 weeks prior to me beginning my research for this essay, and pointed out a chapter on midlife to me then, as relevant (poignant?) to me as I approach my 35th. Another one:
"Before midlife, we tend to measure time in terms of how long we've been alive; after midlife, we are more likely to see things in terms of how much longer we have to live" (Neugarten, 1975)
Perhaps I need to find some more modern research, as I am definitely not alone on the 'midlife and childless' front as I look around my peers.
My cheerless research concluded on issues of identity and self-concept in adolescents who, around middle adolescence (12-15yrs old) develop increasingly sophisticated abstract thinking skills, one manifestation of which is a certain degree of egocentrism, as the 'youth' grapples to differentiate between what they are thinking and what they think everyone else is/ should be thinking. The notion of the imaginary audience made me giggle, as this is exactly a notion that rears its (ugly?) head in this slightly surreal world of blogging. After all, I could be typing this in Microsoft Word and saving to hard drive if I wanted to keep a diary. I am not hoping to get rich quickly in the vain hope/ belief that I might one day monetise/ commercialise this dross, so might this mean that at the tender age of 34.350, I am grappling with teenage angst, playing out my personal fable before an imaginary audience. Gosh, I need to get out and do something more useful instead.
Hasn't been possible for last two weeks however, as an acute bout of bronchitis (caused by as yet undetermined virus?) left me without sleep - due to dry coughing fits - for 5 straight nights, which had the additional adverse effect of stopping me doing anything vaguely productive on the college front, for lack of concentration and energy. Still seem to get tired really easily. lost out on about 600 quid in earnings, but that's only cash. This essay will get me back on track. 3 weeks on. Get the grey matter churning again. Bronchitis by the way is not treated as you might expect with a magic pill or liquid. I was told that the evidence suggests that the usual bronchodilator remedies don't help speed up the resolution of bronchitis. You just have to stick it out. exploding head, exhausting and irritating hacking cough and lack of sleep and all. So my professional advice, as a future health professional. Don't get it. So anyway, after 3 weeks in the health doldrums, I am now starting to feel better, if not yet particularly positive about the world (you can do a lot of thinking in one, just one sleepless night). The last time I did that was back in October 2002, when I was up all night waiting for .. no I won't go back there. So, who know's, I may even have an incredibly succesful November of respiratory revision, pass the practical exam at 3rd time of trying this December with flying colours then start preparing for NHS job interviews. Yup, definitely starting to look upwards and onwards.
I have never asked whether a particular 'tone' comes across to the 4 people I know who read this (2 friends and two, possibly 3 family members). If I did ask I imagine they might say I sound like a miserable fucker. Something I need to work on since no one wants an honest answer to "hey! how are you today?"
Well I apologise that the 'tone' probably comes across the way it does, but I am genuinely grateful (sic. happy) I don't have Cystic Fibrosis.
I did however think that movie was crap, and don't understand the cult-ish like way I hear some people talk about it.
Feeling Christmas-sy? No? This pic of Jo's Dad's car being used to spice up the Tag Heuer Christmas window display at Harrods might get you in the mood ... Steve McQueen once drove the very same car (while wearing a Tag Heuer?) during the movie Le Man.
Or at least I believe that to be the link ... or maybe only racing car drivers can afford Tag Heuers ...
Picard Out.